Comic Cover Of The Week: The Shape Of Elvira #1

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Warning: Astonishing Alliteration and Ironic Innuendo Ahoy…

“It’s raining Elvira’s, hallelujah, it’s raining Elvira’s…” Ah, okay, it isn’t actually raining Elvira (unfortunately!) but this is literally the second Comic Cover Of The Week in a row dedicated to our ferociously favourite, tenaciously teasing tantalising temptress – Elvira: Mistress Of The Dark!

That’s right fellow fans of fantastic fiction, Cassandra Peterson’s awesome alter ego – voluptuous vamp Elvira is back in a brand new mini-series brought to by the dynamically detonating – Dynamite Comics! with this brand spanking new series (as you may have surmised from the title) poking (good-natured) fun at Guillermo Del Toro’s recent hit movie – The Shape Of Water.

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“The Mistress Of The Dark lands the leading role in a touching art film about human/gill monster romance (!?) but there’s something decidedly fishy about her co-star. Is there an Oscar in her future, or is the director Billy Bullworth interested in spawning something more than an Academy Award winning movie?”

Competing compellingly with Elvira’s previous mini-series, the saucy and spooky Shape Of Elvira also boasts a cavalcade compendium of cleavage clad comic-book covers that reaches a combustible crescendo with no less than eight extraordinary variant covers!!

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The first issue of Elvira’s newest astonishing adventure is available at your local comic-book emporium right now! If you’re a fan of Cassandra Peterson’s raunchy, racy, ribald and generally risque alter-ego then dive right on in, and tell her Precinct1313 sent you (oh, and could you get her phone number for me whilst you’re there!?)

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Gotham City Apartment – A Room With A View

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“It’s on the thirteenth floor, appropriately” the landlord mentioned as we approached the apex of the top floor of his ‘luxury’ apartment block.

“Appropriately?” I questioned back at the rather burly man who was quietly fumbling for the requisite key to the apartment we had just reached.

“Oh didn’t I mention, this apartment is really rather special, it has the most glorious view of the city from a large picturesque window situated in its front room, and, well, I dunno, I guess the number thirteen sort of comes to mind whenever I think about him… uh, it!? Mmmmmm, no’one’s really sure if he’s human, or something, else”

My curiosity piqued – ” Him? who exactly are we talking about?”

“Wow, you’re really not from around here are you, I mean your accent sounds, British, right?” the landlord sighed heavily as he finally found the relevant apartment key.

“Yes, I’m English, only been in the states for a couple of days in fact, I’m a writer you see, one in need of a healthy dose of inspiration, I thought travelling across the pond and making my home here in Gotham for a few months might help blow away those writer’s block cobwebs… again, who is this mysterious, entity to whom you refer?”

The landlord turned towards me with a look of startling incredulity “Batman, of course, what rock have you been living under, Brit or not, I mean come on, it’s the goddamn Batman!”

“Batman?” my brow furrowed at the idea “he’s actually real?, I always thought he was some kind of myth, a sort of urban legend, you know a boogeyman type”

The landlord’s lips cracked into a rather ominous smile “Oh he’s the boogeyman alright, ‘cept in his case he only does harm to those who deserve it, anyway, please go in and take a look around, but I suggest you make up your mind quickly if you are at all interested, this apartment is well sought after and I have two more viewings this evening”

The apartment was much larger than I had at first envisioned, but then at the price he was charging I could probably afford a mansion in comparison, but it was, strangely enough, the apartment number that had attracted me to the viewing – 1313, there just seemed something, familiar about it.

“And here we are” the landlord stood in front of a sizeable plate glass window with what could only be described as a spectacular view onto the city itself, yet, with the constant torrential rain and lightning storm, and the ridiculously prodigious amount of black spires and gargoyles that peppered the immediate skyline, Hell came more to mind. “This window is better than any TV set you’ve ever seen, and if you’re looking for inspiration to break your writer’s block, well, this particular room might very well be your new favourite muse”

I pressed my nose against the cold glass “How so?” I asked, curious of his assertion.

“Well, you see, for some reason the Bat seems to frequent this particular area rather often, I mean we do have a rather high crime rate here, but that could be said for the entire city, it’s Gotham after all, infamous across the world for just this reason. This particular suburb – Park Row is actually more famous for one particular street dubbed ‘Crime Alley’ by the locals, if you look just over to your left you can see the infamous thoroughfare, the downgrade of this area began maybe thirty years ago after an awful tragedy involving Gotham’s famous affluent family, The Waynes…”

“Ah, as in the parents of billionaire playboy Bruce Wayne?” I said glancing towards the landlord, who appeared a little miffed at my interruption  “I think I’ve heard this story, but please, continue on Sir”

“As I was saying, it’s been at least three decades since that awful night, when, after a evening out at the movies with their young son Bruce, the Waynes, Thomas and Martha were gunned down in cold blood right before the very eyes of their child, I mean can you imagine that, how it would taint your life… well it certainly tainted this area that’s for sure and the entire city itself, things got worse from that night onward, the city began its slow gradual descent into hell, I know, I know, I sound awfully dramatic but… wait a second, is that?”

The landlord stood transfixed staring out the window, like a deer caught in headlights, “what is it?” I said whirling on the spot following his gaze. Something dark was moving through the buildings, at first it appeared to be some kind of gigantic corvidae, but one of this size would be ridiculous, we continued to watch as the ‘thing’ descended to the ground below. It was then that the darkened figure began to take shape as my eyes adjusted to the light differential outside, it was clearly some kind of humanoid creature, though like no man I had ever encountered before. The head bore two rather long pointed ears and what seemed to be large black wings draped around the impressively framed individual.

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“It’s him!” the landlord exclaimed with an almost childlike glee “told ya huh, can’t believe he appeared just as I was telling you about him though, really creepy timing, and yet…” the landlord glanced at a calendar hanging on the back wall “that’s it!, weirdly enough he seems to come here, to crime alley every year on this particular day”

I looked back towards the calendar “26th of September, Mmmmm, I wonder what the significance of this date is to such a man, umm, creature? that he should appear every year on this very day” I looked back out of the window towards where this ‘Bat’ had been, “he’s gone! I mean, he was there literally a second ago!”

The landlord’s face broadened into a large wry grin “Oh yeah, he’s good at that! off to take down a murderous clown or a riddling sociopath I would hazard, so, after that excitement, what do you think of the place, interested?”

I turned away from the window “I’ll take it” I said confidently.

“Yeah, thought ya would” the landlord passed me the keys”Oh, and we’ve had a few writers rent the place in the past you know, I believe they may have even left some of theirs musings and manuscripts up in the loft area, may be of interest to you.”  The landlord turned on the spot and slowly made his way for the door “Welcome to Gotham” he uttered as he closed the door behind him.

“Thanks” I murmured back “I think I’m going to like it here” I gazed towards the trap door that gave access to the attic area… “yeah, I really think I’m going to like it here”

To Be Continued…

 

Batman and Gotham City are trademarks of DC Comics.

 

 

Precinct1313’s End Of The Year Geekstravaganza…

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Welcome fellow Agents of Precinct1313, and thanks so much for joining us in the malefic mansion of mystery’s infamous Halls of Quaffing for our regular yearly round up of geeky goodness from the space year 2018. So why not pull up a chair, grab a flagon of your favourite beverage and re-live some of our favourite nerdy necessities in comic-book form, from the past twelves months…

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Precinct1313’s Favourite Comic-Book Series Of 2018…

And hoo boy has it been a stand out year for stunning storylines, in fact there have been so many amazing comic-books released this year that picking just three was almost impossible, yet we have managed to do just that with these particularly cool, compelling and consummate creations…

Mister Miracle…

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Scintillating scribe – Tom King was without a doubt the finest choice for taking one of DC Comics’ most beloved Superheroes, expert escapologist Mister Miracle, not only because Tom is one of the very best writers in comics today, but also because his surname ably pairs him with Miracle’s genius and legendary creator – Jack ‘The King’ Kirby!

To honour the 100th anniversary since acclaimed creator (and in our humble opinion – most important figure in comics, ever!) Jack Kirby’s birth, DC Comics alongside writer Tom King and artist Mitch Gerads reunited us with one of Kirby’s most captivating and heralded heroes – super escape artist Mister Miracle, through a 12 issue series that also featured The New Gods from DC’s classic Fourth World Saga.

Miraculous is most definitely the word to describe Tom King and Mitch Gerad’s superlative take on Scott Free’s convoluted life, emotional, poignant and groundbreaking also come to mind when describing the extraordinary genius that this series has been. An unreserved masterpiece, and an emotionally charged, breathtakingly brilliant read every single issue. BUY… IT… NOW!

Doomsday Clock…

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If you’ve been following Precinct1313 for awhile now, you probably realise that Watchmen is unreservedly our favourite comic book of all time. When I first encountered Alan Moore’s trailblazing series in 1986 I was blown away, it was a unique and contemporary take on the Superhero genre, a treatise on social anxiety and a complete deconstruction of Superhero conceptualisation. It was different to everything that came before it, and is almost single-handedly responsible for transforming the face of the comic-book medium for both future creators and readers… a veritable masterpiece!

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Thirty two years later and writer Geoff Johns and artist Gary Franks effortlessly transport us back to the wonderfully dark and grimy world set up by Moore, through DC’s 12 issue maxi-series Doomsday Clock. Stylistically the comic evokes the original material perfectly from the dialogue set through to the originals nine panel layout, both visually and tone wise this feels perfectly at home with its peerless predecessor.

If you’re a fan of Watchmen and can get past the apparent controversy that a sequel to the seminal original exists, then this is a must buy. Johns and Franks have presented an excessively well written, dark but at times amusing sequel to the originals world of masked vigilantes, chaos and deep rooted fears and anxiety, and I for one have enjoyed every moment of my stay in its fatalistic presence.

Supergirl: Being Super…

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(Ok, Ok, this technically came out in 2017 – but I didn’t personally experience it until the beginning of 2018, hence its place on this list)

Origin Tales have been, let’s be honest, spectacularly overused in both the comic-book scene and their spin off movie counterparts, I mean how many times do we really need to witness Batman losing his parents to the gun barrel of Joe Chill or Spiderman being bitten by a radioactive arachnid, these characters are now so iconic that even non comic-book fans are overly familiar with their backstories.

With that said, you may feel slightly bemused by my inclusion of a series that dynamically delves into the past of Superman’s famous cousin, Kara Zor-El, but there is a genuinely good reason for that… because it’s fantastic!! In fact, it’s not only one of the greatest Supergirl comics to have ever released, but, one of the greatest comic-book series ever published… period!

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Supergirl: Being Super is the Mariko Tamaki penned opus that transcends Kara’s origins by offering us a fresh take that focuses more upon her relationships, trials and tribulations of everyday life as a teenage girl growing up in a small american town. It’s a slower burn as a comic, with less super heroics but more angst, sass and quirky dialogue, as we follow Kara in an engaging and fantastically well written coming of age tale. 

If you approach the series with atypical expectations of copious amounts of explosions, super speed and heat vision, you’re going to leave disappointed, this is a tale that spotlights the person behind the iconic “S”  symbol and it’s all the better for it. Supergirl: Being Super is another stunning revelation in Superhero story telling, and my favourite iteration of the classic character thus far.

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Precinct1313’s Most Popular Posts Of 2018…

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Phew, what a year huh… I have to say that we haven’t output as many posts this year as we did in 2017, but, unfortunately, sometimes life just gets in the way right? That said, 2018 has been the year where the Precinct’s readership and followers have increased exponentially more than any other year thus far. By far the most viewed posts emanating from the majestic mansion of mystery have been the World’s Finest interview series, which, by the way are also my absolute faves to write! We also dipped our creative toes into the oceanic depths of YouTube unboxing videos with the Vlog1313 vids, where we endeavoured to share with you our unparalleled love for the stunningly realised physical forms of our beloved heroes and villains.

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The most popular and perused of our World’s Finest posts this year was the Death interview, starring Morpheus’ soul guiding sister – Didi. Which I’m sure you are all dying to relive right here: World’s Finest: An Exclusive Interview With Death

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My personal favourite to write was the Circe interview, an amazing and in my opinion underutilised Wonder Woman foe with a marvellous mythologically rich backstory and a power set that easily rivals her titular foe. Delight in her damnation of our hapless interviewer right here: World’s Finest: An Exclusive Interview With Circe

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The most viewed of our V-Log1313 videos also has my favourite statue I have yet procured for my collection, the remarkable recreation of Amanda Conner’s stunning Starfire #1 cover from the fantastic 2015 12-issue maxi series. You can view my amateurish first steps to video authoring right here: V-Log1313: Amanda Conner Starfire Statue Unboxing

And with that, all that’s really left to say is Happy New Year to all of the Precinct’s followers, readers and fellow bloggers, as ever it is you that makes this entire endeavour worthwhile! Oh, and as always… Make Mine DC!

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Great British Comic-Book Characters: Marshal Law

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Borag Thungg fellow fans of fantastic fiction, and welcome to another eccentrically enthralling episode of Great British Comic-Book Characters our occasional series that aims to acquaint you with some of our very favourite fictional figures originating from this tiny island known as the United Kingdom.

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The British comic book scene has been active as long as its more famous American counterpart, and as long and varied as its history has been… very few costumed characters of the traditional spandex clad Superhero have emerged from this sceptred isle. That’s not to say that no characters of heroic nature have emanated from the UK, just that they tend not to follow in the footsteps of their more audacious USA brethren. Though long time allies and compeers, our differences couldn’t be more palpable, especially in the wonderful world that is comic books.

And, oh boy, Marshal Law is the epitome of this disparity, a fascistic, radically authoritarian creation that actually falls in line with a rather large amount of stylistically created fictional persona that have emanated from this country over several decades of both comic-books and general fiction (film, television, novels). Politically charged and anti-authoritarian issues have always had the biggest influences in the UK’s most popular comic book characters, from the obviously  quasi-fascist vision of future law enforcement that is Judge Dredd, through recalcitrant characters such as Zenith, V, and Nemesis the Warlock, British comic creators have always revelled in counterculture paradigms.

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Marshal Law is a government sanctioned “Hero Hunter” a super-powered member of the San Futuro police Department, San Futuro is a sprawling metropolis from the near future that rose from the ashes of San Francisco following a devastating earthquake. Marshal revels in his position as a Cape killer, with his raison d’etre revolving around taking down rogue Superheroes, Marshal derives an unhealthy amount of gratification and joy from this task, utilising an almost unlimited arsenal of ridiculously over the top weaponry/ heavy ordnance (and good ol’ fashion fisticuffs) he is uncompromising in both his use of violence and lack of emotional wealth… a true sociopath.

Marshal’s secret identity is Joe Gilmore, an ex super-soldier, who is overwhelmed with a malign sense of self loathing due to his manifest super powers. In this alternate future Genetic engineering has swept San Futuro and the USA at large, with most of America’s armed forces utilising the science to create the ultimate Ubermensch.

Though, the act of saddling the military populace with overt powers also led to an increase in detrimental psychological effects on the subjects, psychosis is prevalent amongst the majority of the soldiers, also the inability to control or understand their wildly chaotic powers. Upon leaving military servitude, these super powered individuals would often take up the cape and cowl to become Superheroes and yet their gradually diminishing mental capabilities and lack of remorse or any sense of compassion led them down a darker path more akin to the classic SuperVillain as opposed to the heroic archetype, which essentially leads to Marshal Law’s emergence as a hero hunter, whose own advanced abilities and detestation of genetic super-beings lead him down a violent, pitiable path of reckless redemption for his own self loathing due to his inherited mutation.

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Marshal Law was first unleashed onto unsuspecting Brit comic-book fans by Epic Comics in October 1987, a six issue mini-series created by 2000AD stalwarts Kev O’ Neill and the legendary Pat Mills. The resulting series led on to a fantastic one shot  “Marshal Law Takes Manhattan” in which he proceeded to eliminate perfectly parodied variants of Marvel characters. It’s these satirical parody’s of mainstream American Superheroes that has been a marvellous mainstay of his adventures throughout the years, DC characters such as Batman and Superman have also felt the sting of Marshal’s wrath with some absolutely fantastic and (especially in the case of Batman’s variant) outlandishly bizarre versions of the beloved heroes.

Marshal Law is an extreme satire of Superhero/Anti-hero tropes, mixed with outlandish humour, feverishly idiosyncratic art by the fantastic Kev O’Neill and the legendary Pat Mills at his politico anti-establishment finest. As long as you’re not easily offended, and can tolerate seeing your favourite Superhero get shot, stabbed, decapitated, electrocuted crushed, smushed, blown up, immolated and generally wiped the floor with by its titular star – Marshal Law… then this comes highly recommended!

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World’s Finest: An Exclusive Interview With Lego Batman

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Welcome fellow Agents of Precinct1313 to another exhilarating episode of “World’s Finest” a series of exclusive interviews that aim to introduce you to some of our very favourite convocation of comic-book characters of… all… time!

Each episode we cordially invite one of our most treasured – Superheroes, SuperVillains, Costumed Crimefighters, Dimension Dwelling Demons and, of course, Super-Pets to answer a quotient of quintessentially quirky questions about life, the universe, and cake (’cause everyone loves cake!)

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And so, let’s welcome to Precinct1313’s stately sanguine sofa of shockingly satirical secrets – the larger than life, laudable yet litigious loner – Lego Batman!

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Precinct1313: Welcome Bats, and thanks so much for joining us on this weeks World’s Finest.

Lego Batman: It’s Batman… B-A-T-M-A-N! not Bats or Batsy, or any other cute nickname… I’m the goddamn Batman!

Precinct1313: Uuh, I’m sorry, Batman… loving that Frank Miller reference though, very cool.

Lego Batman: Who?

Precinct1313: You know, Frank Miller, one of the most celebrated chroniclers of your adventures.

Lego Batman: Never heard of the guy, I, of course, chronicle my own adventures, I mean, who else could do as an amazing job as me… I’m Batman, although Alfred is currently helping write my memoirs for my upcoming autobiography.

Precinct1313: Intriguing, and what’s the title of said book so I can pick it up once it’s available.

Lego Batman: “I’m Batman – An Autobiography”

Precinct1313: Erm, that title seems a little… simple, for someone of your stature…

Lego Batman: It does have a subtitle.

Precinct1313: Which is?

Lego Batman: “The Memoirs Of The World’s Most Significantly Awesome And Greatest Superhero, Who Has Beaten Superman In Every Fight Ever, Has Dated Wonder Woman, Catwoman, Zatanna, Power Girl… In Fact Every Female Superhero In Existence, Is A Billionaire Genius With Lots Of Cool Gadgets And A Batcave, And Is Appreciably More Important Than Anyone Who Has Ever… Ever Lived”

Precinct1313: That is, uuh, one seriously impressively long subtitle you have there.

Lego Batman: Yeah, well, the ladies dig a guy with an impressively long subtitle…

Precinct1313: I’m sorry!?

Lego Batman: Oh nothing, go on, ask me another question so I can dazzle you with my wit, charm, expertise and, of course, supreme modesty…

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“That’s right ladies, I’ve got everything anyone would ever need, wit, charm, billions of dollars and an impressively long, uh… utility belt! “

Precinct1313: Ok then, now you recently starred in a big budget blockbuster movie, how hard was the switch from a night-clad costumed vigilante to an actor and superstar?

Lego Batman: Pfft! well I’ve always been a superstar…. world’s greatest Superhero, remember, but it also turns out I’m a damn fine thespian also…

Precinct1313: It had quite the cast list too, with virtually every member of your infamous Rogues Gallery appearing. 

Lego Batman: Mmmmm, speaking of my Rogues Gallery, is that a photo of you and the Mischievous Minx of Mayhem hanging on the wall?

Precinct1313: You mean the photo of Harley Quinn and myself? yes indeed she was a guest on the show a few months back… in fact she was sat on that very sofa you are on right now.

Lego Batman: Whaaaaat! why didn’t you tell me, the sofa is probably rigged to explode, or implode… it’s definitely going to do some kind of ‘ploding’ that’s for sure…

Precinct1313: Eh, surely not, I mean she was really rather nice to be honest, well apart from the bit where she violently assaulted me with a comically oversized mallet.

Lego Batman: Mmmm, yes, as I suspected, the sofa is rigged with Smilex gas… the Joker’s deadly toxin, and through the pressure of my Bat-butt I seem to have triggered the mechanism… we have only seconds to live!

Precinct1313: I’m sorry! did you say seconds to live!? ummm, what are we going to do!?

Lego Batman: Well I’m going to retrieve my Bat gas-mask from my trusty utility belt, whereas you will likely inhale the Smilex, laugh manically until your internal organs rupture and then die in severe pain with a hideous rictus grin on your face… unfortunately!

Precinct1313: Eep!

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Lego Batman is trademark: DC Comics.

Rorschach’s Quote(s) Of The Week

*Warning: Doomsday Clock Spoilers Ahoy me hearties!*

“Rorschach’s Journal: November 15, 2017 – I appear to be back, or am I? after my obvious demise at the hands of Doc Manhattan how is this possible… who am I, where am I, and what has happened to my physicality? I appear to be someone… other, hmmm, a paradox!”

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“Hrmm… I’m Back… Seemingly”

Hey, have you heard? Rorschach’s back! That’s right the viciously vehement vigilante with the ink blot mask, surly temper and loathing for the criminal fraternity has re-materialised on the physical plane after his apparent deadly demise at the hands of Doc Manhattan… or has he!? Well that’s a spoiler that I reverently refuse to reveal! What I am going to share with you though, fellow CrimeBusters, are some of the phenomenally perfect panels from Rorschach’s recent rendezvous with classic characters from the DC Universe… especially Batman, in fact, Batsy and ‘schach make for an almost peerless comic(al) duo…

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Where Does He Get Those Wonderful Toys!?

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Kitchen Utensils Are A Prerequisite For Rorschach, You Never Know When He Might Fancy The Odd Cold Tin Of Beans..

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The Rorschach Equivalent Of – “Are We There Yet?”

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It’s Not Like You Ever Eat Anything Anyway Though Bruce…

And this one may not have Rorschach in it (though he is just off panel) but it’s way too fantastic not to include…

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DC’s Doomsday Clock series is a semi sequel to Alan Moore’s phenomenal and groundbreaking original 80’s masterpiece, and happily holds it’s head high in comparison to it’s almost unparalleled peer, highly recommended.

Rorschach, Batman, Doctor Manhattan, Joker and Doomsday Clock Are Trademark: DC Comics.

Day Of Wonder: Precinct1313 Celebrate The Themysciran Titan With The Return Of… Classic Wonder Woman!

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Day Of Wonder – A Celebration of all things Wonder Woman is upon us my astounding Amazonian associates! Hera’s heraldic hero of hope has been astonishing us with fantastic feats and stunning storylines for well over 75 years, and in that time has immersed herself in all forms of entertainment media, through comic-books, television, animation, novelisations, video-games and, most recently, a bombastic big budget live action movie courtesy of Gal Gadot and Patty Jenkins.

We love Wondy here in Precinct1313, she is, without a shadow of doubt, our most beloved comic-book character of… all… time! (sorry Batsy!) but looking back through our recent posts we realise that we haven’t written a great deal about Zeus’ favoured daughter in a while, which constitutes a travesty… one that will be rectified forthwith with the return of our popular Classic Wonder Woman series, the last episode of which was posted 2 years ago to this day (and can be re-experienced right HERE)

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So why not join us as we head back to the golden shores of Amazon paradise Themyscira to bask in the illuminating presence of Princess Diana and her immortal sisters, as we once more head down into the Ancient Amazon Archives to relive Wondy’s greatest triumphs and tribulations…

Classic Wonder Woman: The Odyssey Returns…

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The golden sands of Themyscira beckon us back to their bounteous beauty as we search for meaning beyond our enlightening and impactful odyssey through it’s ancient Amazon archives. 

Our colossal crusade reached its crescendo two years ago to this day, and since exiting the labyrinthian libraries we have ultimately found our lives empty and devoid of the inspiration that these bygone Amazonian tales regaled us with, since returning to mortal realms. So it is with new found purpose that we once more set our sights on the idyllic isle of the immortals and venture forth unto the archives to retrieve and collate the tenacious tomes that reside within its deepest recesses.

Chapter 1: The Return

The journey was arduous, our ship was a ramshackle and decrepit shadow of its former self, two years since its last voyage and nary a care given in that time to its upkeep and condition. We could almost be forgiven for our lack of maintenance for the intrepid vessel, when we departed Themyscira we never believed we would ever return to the fabled isle, and the ship that wrought our original voyage became a painful memory of a past we desired to never see end.

“The Odyssey” was the name we had borne our ship with, an apt moniker for our journey certainly bore out its titular title. Though badly dilapidated, the vessel forged its way through the vast oceans and deadly perils of our pilgrimage with an almost sentient purpose. Themyscira island had been hidden away by the old Gods for millenia to protect its imperishable inhabitants from the horrors and injustices of the outside world, and though we had once proudly walked its flaxen beaches and lush forests, finding our way back was to be a feat worthy of Hercules himself.

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Standing at the bow, I braced myself against the cooling zephyr and tang of acrid sea salt, in the not too far distance a storm of such severity that it could only have been created by Poseidon himself in an effort to deter our perilous journey brewed, its course set for our bijou and insignificant vessel. The Odyssey hit the deadly squall head on, its sails buckled and warping from the extreme pressure of the sudden tempest, the decks ruptured beneath our feet flooding deadly ice cold death unto our intrepid ship… all seemed lost, and yet…

Warmth and bird song greeted us as we opened our eyes to the incredulous sight of what was the most beautifully beguiling and serene being we had ever encountered.

Untitled design.jpg “Merciful Minerva! are you alright?” came the comforting voice from this resplendent soul  “Be calm now, you are safe, your vessel is done, I am afraid, but I have managed to pluck you from a certain watery grave… welcome back mortals, to Themyscira!”

To Be Continued…

Happy Wonder Woman Day, My Astonishing Amazonian Associates!

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DC Release First Pic Of Ruby Rose As Batwoman… And It’s AWESOME!

Well, what can we say but… holy hallowed heroines, Ruby Rose looks absolutely stunning in the first promo pic released by DC Comics earlier today:

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The astounding actress will be portraying Batman’s popular parallel peer – Batwoman as she joins CW’s Arrow-verse for a brand new Elseworlds crossover. Kate Kane is one of the Precinct’s very favourite female Superheroes so we were extremely excited yet highly hesitant when we heard of a live action version of the character appearing on the small screen. We shouldn’t have worried though because Ruby was the absolute perfect casting choice… and that costume, we are blown away, it is nigh on a flawless replica of the outfit from the comic-books themselves, perfection in pictorial form.

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More news and pics incoming fellow fans of fantastic fiction…

V-Log1313: Stunning Starfire Statue Sizzles Salient Satisfaction…

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Hey there fellow Agents of Precinct1313 and welcome to another episode of V-Log1313. Now, you may remember in a previous vid we unboxed the astonishingly adorable Amanda Conner variant of our favourite fiery alien Princess- Starfire, well this episode we shall be delving into the world of one of her legendary co-creators, glorious George Perez, with a sterling statue based upon his astounding artwork from a classic comic cover of the consummate 80’s title – The New Teen Titans. And so, without further ado, let the unboxing commence…

Thanks for watching fellow fans of fantastic fiction, our next unboxing vid will star the one, and only – Donna Troy, also known as Wonder Girl! so stay tuned for in one short month Donna will be Golden Lassoing her way into the Precinct’s vicarious video vaults in readiness for her placement on the fabled Superlative Shelf of Superhero Statues!

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RIP – Norm Breyfogle: My All Time Favourite Batman Artist

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It is with a heavy heart that last week I discovered that my favourite Batman artist of all time, the inimitable Norm Breyfogle passed away on September 24 at a mere 58 years of age. The details of his untimely passing are currently being kept private by his family but what we do know is that Norm suffered a stroke a couple of years back which affected the left side of his body, including his drawing arm.

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I have been a Bat-fan since I was six years of age, and although my favourite period of his myriad of adventures was the mid seventies, drawn by the amazing Neal Adams and written by the dazzling Denny O’Neil, I was rather too young to read them at the time. The Batman I actually grew up with was the eighties version, this is post Frank Miller’s ground-breaking and character defining – Dark Knight Returns, and of all the fantastic artists that drew the continuing adventures of everyone’s favourite nocturnal, pointy eared vigilante, without a doubt my favourite was Norm Breyfogle.

Teamed up with British comic writer – Alan Grant they created some of the greatest Batman tales ever put to paper throughout their extremely long run (1987-1993) on Batman’s premium title Detective Comics. Norm’s style suited the character flawlessly, angular, gothic and almost Germanic in its form, he would go on to set a precedent for how we view the look of the Batman today.

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Our thought go out to Norm’s family and friends at this very sad time.

Comic Cover(s) Of The Week: Elvira – Mistress Of The Dark #2

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*Warning – The Innuendo Is Strong With This One!*

A double dose of cool comic cover creativeness this week… or perhaps I should say a double D considering the star of these far from innocent issues is none other than our favourite voluptuous vixen vamp… Elvira!

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That’s right fellow fans of fantastic fiction, Cassandra Peterson’s suggestively insinuating heroine has returned thanks to a brand new four issue mini series courtesy of Dynamite Comics.

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Double-entendres (surprise, surprise!) abound as we follow the Mistress of the Dark as she hurtles her way through horror history whilst hounded by the villainous Vlad Tepes. Last issue, after a tangle with a time travelling casket, our titular celebutante gate-crashed Mary Shelley’s infamous monster party, raided a spooky wine cellar and fended off the audacious advances of bloodsucking impaler Tepes.

This month our heroic hell-cat, having temporarily given the dastardly Dracul the slip, teams up with none other than eerie Edgar Allan Poe for a second round bout with the recurring viciously vile and vehement Vlad. 

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And why not throw yourselves into a chasm of cleavage clad comic covers, as each and every issue throws up a veritable treasure chest (with the emphasis, of course, on chest… I mean c’mon, it’s Elvira!) of variants of our voracious virago vixen.

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Cassandra Peterson’s celebrity chasing creation – Elvira was first brought to the fore an astonishing thirty five years ago! and since that time has been the star of both film and television. The horror hostess extreme has ruled over her fervent fandom with her irreverent, suggestive and allusion laden humour, with Dynamite’s fantastic comic series capturing every nuance of her fourth wall breaking voluptuously vulgar verbose. A fabulously fun read for both fans and newcomers alike… her hellacious hijinks come highly recommended!

 

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V-Log 1313: Halloween Batgirl Unboxing…

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Oh hey there fellow Agents, it’s great to see you down here in the celebrated Comic Crypts of Precinct1313. Now if you’d just like to follow me, we are about to take a short trip to our validly vicarious Video Vaults, where we shall indulge in another round of cool unboxing. This enthralling episode we shall be introducing you to the vampire vixen variant version of the bombastic ‘Bombshells Batgirl’ statue! And so, without further ado, let the unboxing commence…

Thanks for watching fellow fans of fantastic fiction, we have another unboxing video incoming rather soon which will star our absolute favourite fiery alien Princess – Koriand’r of Tamaran, or more popularly known as Starfire (yes indeed, a brand new Starfire statue… so exciting!) So stay tuned, the disembodied hands of master unboxing talent shall return, same Bat-time, same Bat-channel… 

A Celebration Of Kate And Bette Kane…

Well now, how excited do you think we are right now here in the celebrated Comic Crypts of Precinct1313? I mean, I assume you’ve heard the rather awesome news, right? Batwoman is finally materialising into live action form… yep, Batwoman… how awesome? Much awesome fellow Agents, much.

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CW, the company responsible for DC Comics’ vice like grip on small screen Superhero sagas are to add another of DC’s worlds finest creations to their burgeoning cast list in the form of Kate Kane, aka Batwoman. And, in what appears to be the finest piece of actor casting in recent history, they have also revealed that popular actress Ruby Rose will be donning the iconic black and red costume of Gotham’s titular anti-hero… anticipation overload in 3… 2… 

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Ruby Rose Has Been  Confirmed In The Role Of Batwoman!

Batwoman had been skirting the edges of the DC Universe since her original introduction by comic-book auteurs Bob Kane and Sheldon Moldoff in Detective Comics #233 in 1956. Kate (known as Kathy in her original form) was initially created as a female counterpart and love interest for Batman to refute the idea that the Caped Crusader had homosexual tendencies. An unfortunate and rather disturbingly awful vision for any comic book creation to be ushered into the limelight, the 1950’s were an extremely unenlightened time, sexism and misogyny ran rampant in all areas, and especially the entertainment arena, which included the wildly popular comic book scene.

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Kathy And Bette Circa 1961

In 1961, Sheldon Moldoff, alongside Batman co-creator Bill Finger, added Betty Kane to the ever growing Bat-Family as the niece of Kathy, whom upon discovering the secret identity of her crime fighting aunt, persuaded her to train her as her sidekick, resulting in the initiation of Batgirl, long before the mantle was taken up by the arguably more famous Barbara Gordon version of the wildly popular character. Just three short years later though, Batgirl, Batwoman and other popular members of Bruce’s broody band (such as Ace the Bathound and the mischievous Bat-Mite) were removed entirely from Bat lore in a restructure of the Batman universe by new editor Julius Schwartz.

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Bruce And Kate Unite In A Scene From The Recent Animated Movie – Batman: Bad Blood

Kathy and Betty Kane remained consigned to creative memory for decades following their shock erasure, that is until their revamped and progressive resurgence through the hands of master scribe and astonishing artist JH Williams III. Reversing the unenlightened and inauspicious history of the characters, Williams delivered to us strong, diverse and sophisticated heroes who could match their peers in Gotham, and finally laid to rest the awful spectre of their past conception. Phoenix like, Kathy and Betty (now renamed Kate and Bette) became a new standard for empowerment in the burgeoning female Superhero market, shrugging off their inception and, especially for Kate, becoming one of DC’s most popular and biggest selling creations.

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In fact, aside from sharing similar names, the two variants of Batwoman couldn’t be more disparate if they tried. Whereas Kathy was a fun loving socialite with the hots for Bruce Wayne, Kate is resilient, no nonsense ex military, who, until recently, cast herself independent from Batman and his crime-busting cohorts. Also of note is Kate’s sexual orientation, Kate is a lesbian, and much was made of this revelation at the time with both good and bad press from various media outlets. Ultimately it proved not just a popular move by the creators, but also a defining trait for the character of Batwoman herself, with LGBT groups worldwide heralding the character and Kate ultimately becoming a poster child of diversification and emancipation.

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Bette Kane Eventually Took On The Mantle Of Flamebird, With Her Relationship To Kate  Retconned To Cousin, As Opposed To Niece

Are You As Excited As We Are For Kate’s Live Action Debut? Then Why Not Sound Off In The Comments Section Below, Fellow Fans Of Fantastic Fiction…

 

The Week In Geek… With Precinct1313 – SDCC Special

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Welcome fellow Agents of Precinct1313 to another exhilarating episode of  ‘The Week In Geek’  where we love to share our favourite – Comic Book, Video-Game and Cult Movie news for your perusal and pleasure. And so once more unto the geek dear Agents, once more…

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Well, of course they did…

A veritable feast for the eyes was unveiled at this years largest American geek gathering – San Diego Comic-Con, in fact smorgasbord would be a rather more fitting word for the absolutely astonishing avalanche of DC Comics greatness that was available… and, of course, your ever prescient Precinct1313 is here to share said greatness with you, it’s fellow Agents, beginning with…

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The First Trailer For Shazam… Blew Minds!

It’s an unfortunate thing being a geek sometimes… especially when awesome stuff comes along that literally explodes your head, I mean it’s such an unpleasant and rather icky chore to constantly pick up brain matter and skull fragments from the floor every time something uber cool makes an appearance… and the trailer for DC Comics’ cinematic adaptation for the coming of age Superhero – Shazam is just that thing. In fact the trailer is so damnably great, that I rigorously had my hands pressed hard against my head to stop the inevitable explosion of said geeky brain matter (more fool me of course… implosions are just as goddamn messy!) 

Indulge in the trailer below fellow fans of fantastic fiction…

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Aquaman Trailer Makes Waves At SDCC…

Sorry folks if you’ve just finished scooping up your inevitably exploded heads from the floor after watching the stonking Shazam trailer, cos it’s about to happen again with the premier for James Wan’s adaptation of DC’s king of the seas, Aquaman. Atlantis’ favoured son, Arthur Curry, will be surfing his way towards the big screen this Winter, and under the guidance of film auteur – the aforementioned Wan, everyone is expecting great things… and this first glimpse definitely does not disappoint… it’s looking like the tide has finally turned for Aquaman.

Luxuriate In The Trailer Below My Astonishing Atlantean Associates…

 

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Stargirl – Coming Back To A Small Screen Near You Soon…

We love the character of Stargirl here in Precinct1313’s comic crypts, she has been a favourite of ours for many a year now. So it was with great delight when we saw her pop up in CW’s live action Legends Of Tomorrow series, and she was actually rather well realised in the episodes. Yet, we were really hoping she would ultimately become a team mainstay, alas that never happened… luckily though, one of her creators, the fantastic Geoff Johns is currently working on bringing Courtney Whitmore back for her own series, for DC’s upcoming digital streaming service – DC Universe.

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Two live action versions of Courtney have already materialised through shows Smallville (inset pic) and Legends of Tomorrow. but you can never have too much Stargirl, so a third version, by her own creator no less, is definitely welcome.

The project is an emotional and significant one for Johns, who based the character on his sister, Courtney, who died in a plane explosion in the 90’s. Johns will both write and produce the series along with cohort Greg Berlanti, who has been the driving force behind DC’s commanding Superheroic presence on the small screen with such shows as Supergirl, The Flash and Arrow.

Why not join us again next time friends, for more Week In Geek…

World’s Finest: An Exclusive Interview With Death

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Welcome fellow Agents of Precinct1313 to another exhilarating episode of  “World’s Finest”  a series of exclusive interviews that aim to introduce you to some of our very favourite convocation of comic-book characters of… all… time!

Each episode we cordially invite one of our most treasured – Superheroes, SuperVillains, Costumed Crimefighters, Dimension Dwelling Demons, and, of course, Super-Pets to answer a quotient of quintessentially quirky questions about life, the Universe, and cake (’cause everyone loves cake)

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And so, let us welcome to Precinct1313’s sacred sanguine sofa of significantly satirical secrets: the Dame of Demise and Duchess of the Deceased – Death, of the Endless…

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Precinct1313: Hi there Death, and thanks so much for joining us on this week’s Worlds Finest.

Death: Hi, thanks so much for having me, you can call me Didi, if you prefer.

Precinct1313: Didi? as in die die?

Death: Uh, that’s a little morbid don’t you think? no, as in Deedee.

Precinct1313: Got it, though I do find your morbidity comment rather amusing, I mean, you are the Grim Reaper after all…

Death: Ha ha, nope, that’s my predecessor, although we had to let him go… he was literally scaring people to death!

Precinct1313: Isn’t that kind of the point though, y’know, harvester of souls and all…

Death: Mmmmm, I tend to keep things a little lighter, I mean that whole skull and scythe thing is a little too on the nose, don’t you think?

Precinct1313: Umm, I guess… though technically you perform the same service, right?

Death: In a way, but I tend to gently lead people into the afterlife as opposed to, how did you put it… harvest their souls?

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Precinct1313: So, I’m intrigued, how does this whole cycle of life thing work, I mean, how do you specifically know when someone’s about die?

Death: Mmmmm, it’s a little complicated, but I guess the best way to describe it is that I can see the tapestry of their lives unfolding before me as a cartographical certainty. Would you like me to reveal your fate? your ultimate denouement as an example of this?

Precinct1313: I’d really rather you didn’t, thanks…

Death: Ah okay, I understand, you’ll know soon enough anyway…

Precinct1313: Uhhh, what does that mean?

Death: Oh nothing, shall we move on, I do tend to lead a rather busy life y’know…

Precinct1313: Erm, okay… So, my first ever encounter with your character was through the Neil Gaiman masterpiece – Death: The High Cost Of Living, any thoughts on Mr Gaiman and his prodigious writing talent?

Death: Neil is fantastic, a true gent and an outstanding talent, it’s through him that I’ve been able to share my many wonderful adventures and memories.

Precinct1313: I see, and he has been relaying said adventures about yourself and extended family, The Endless, since 1989 I believe.

Death: That he has.

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Precinct1313: Well Death, uh Didi, may I just say, once again, thanks so much for joining us on this weeks World’s Finest.

Death: It’s been a pleasure, it’s time for us to go anyway…

Precinct1313: Us?

Death: Why yes, why else do you think I’m here?

Precinct1313: For the interview, of course…

Death: I’m afraid not… it’s time, just take my hand…

Precinct1313: But, but, I have an appointment at 3pm.

Death: Unfortunately, you’re not going to make it…

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*Death, and all images are copyright: Vertigo/DC Comics*